Awed by professional stupidity
As some "published" people keep bragging about, you don't actually need a degree in journalism to be a good writer. But you still need some IQ if you actually want to write. Trouble is, contributors and columnists do not get in the pages of newspapers because they're good. Rather, it's usually a) they know the publisher/ editor/ whatever, b) they're popular, or c) they paid the newspaper to get them printed.
Sad enough, these idiots actually get paid to write their crap. Take Philippine Star's Baby Gil for example. One time she did a review on Avril Lavigne (disclaimer: I absolutely believe that Avril is just another pretentious punk who can't sing and can't play). Baby Gil raved about how angsty Avril is, how good a performer she is, and how she is the Alanis Morisette of our time. Heck, Avril? The Alanis of our time?!
And often, since Gil's opinions (are never wrong, whoever made that stupid adage...) are usually baseless, her comparisons are even worse. Her review on Greenday's American Idiot praised the punk band by comparing their "lyrics" to that of Usher's.
Generation gap does have its effects... But another PhilStar columnist, whose name I cannot remember (and I probably shouldn't) did a review of the PC game Call of Duty. I'm only basing his age by his mugshot and, I'm guessing there's no generation gap whatsoever. He wrote his review as if it was the first FPS (first person shooter) he ever played. He was actually raving about Call of Duty's features that have been a basic in that technology since Half-life 1.
Another broadsheet reviewer that deserves space in this write-up would be BusinessWorld's Doy Ariola. While his writing can sometimes be good, witty at times, he's mostly a guy who does not understand what he just saw. Then he proceeds on lambasting the movie he barely understood. For one, he said The Bourne Supremacy was "a de-glamorized James Bond," and requested a Constantine sequel "with more brains," as if he had enough brains to understand it in the first place. And I quote, "The movie suggests The X-Files and CSI with a dash of The Seventh Sign with Constantine and his sidekick, Angie, trying to find out who murdered her twin sister. If you enjoy watching goody-two-shoe mortals battling demons in Charmed, Buffy and Angel, then Constantine will be your cup of tea." Jesus Christ! I say, That's not what fucking happened! He and a fellow film critic, graze the pages every weekend. The older (and higher-paid) critic rarely appreciates movies and keeps on making impossible comparisons, like say, Incredibles versus Spirited Away. Most of the time though, he keeps on hating films because they are not in the leagues of Battleship Potemkin or The Bicycle Thief.
Anyway, since I read the BusinessWorld for a living, I am frequently unfortunate to encounter these idiots. Call it bitterness, call it whatever fuck you blokes can conjure.
There was once this Internet Gaming article written by a BW Senior Reporter and he actually, described Dungeons and Dragons to be a game "where players get to choose their own adventure." I edited it out of course, fuckin' idiot should at least know the difference between a board game and a choose-your-own-adventure. In any case, this Senior Reporter is BW's self-proclaimed tech-dude. He also said something about a game being so beautifully 3D, it was like watching anime. Is it not common knowledge that animes are cel-shaded and not 3D?!
Some of the idiotic blunders are actually hilariously funny. (Like the time when I forgot the "L" in the word health, making a headline read: Official on leave due to HEATH reasons.) An artsy-fartsy columnist once wrote something about the weirdness of today's music groups, so ridiculous they are called Savage Garden, Backstreet Boys, and ALANIS MORISSETTE. An unknown writer even mentioned "Marvel's Batman."
Bottomline, feature writing for newspapers and magazines is not like writing in your journal. Well, since reviews are their opinions in the matter, it's never wrong I suppose, just plain stupid. And you can't blame people for being stupid.
Sad enough, these idiots actually get paid to write their crap. Take Philippine Star's Baby Gil for example. One time she did a review on Avril Lavigne (disclaimer: I absolutely believe that Avril is just another pretentious punk who can't sing and can't play). Baby Gil raved about how angsty Avril is, how good a performer she is, and how she is the Alanis Morisette of our time. Heck, Avril? The Alanis of our time?!
And often, since Gil's opinions (are never wrong, whoever made that stupid adage...) are usually baseless, her comparisons are even worse. Her review on Greenday's American Idiot praised the punk band by comparing their "lyrics" to that of Usher's.
Generation gap does have its effects... But another PhilStar columnist, whose name I cannot remember (and I probably shouldn't) did a review of the PC game Call of Duty. I'm only basing his age by his mugshot and, I'm guessing there's no generation gap whatsoever. He wrote his review as if it was the first FPS (first person shooter) he ever played. He was actually raving about Call of Duty's features that have been a basic in that technology since Half-life 1.
Another broadsheet reviewer that deserves space in this write-up would be BusinessWorld's Doy Ariola. While his writing can sometimes be good, witty at times, he's mostly a guy who does not understand what he just saw. Then he proceeds on lambasting the movie he barely understood. For one, he said The Bourne Supremacy was "a de-glamorized James Bond," and requested a Constantine sequel "with more brains," as if he had enough brains to understand it in the first place. And I quote, "The movie suggests The X-Files and CSI with a dash of The Seventh Sign with Constantine and his sidekick, Angie, trying to find out who murdered her twin sister. If you enjoy watching goody-two-shoe mortals battling demons in Charmed, Buffy and Angel, then Constantine will be your cup of tea." Jesus Christ! I say, That's not what fucking happened! He and a fellow film critic, graze the pages every weekend. The older (and higher-paid) critic rarely appreciates movies and keeps on making impossible comparisons, like say, Incredibles versus Spirited Away. Most of the time though, he keeps on hating films because they are not in the leagues of Battleship Potemkin or The Bicycle Thief.
Anyway, since I read the BusinessWorld for a living, I am frequently unfortunate to encounter these idiots. Call it bitterness, call it whatever fuck you blokes can conjure.
There was once this Internet Gaming article written by a BW Senior Reporter and he actually, described Dungeons and Dragons to be a game "where players get to choose their own adventure." I edited it out of course, fuckin' idiot should at least know the difference between a board game and a choose-your-own-adventure. In any case, this Senior Reporter is BW's self-proclaimed tech-dude. He also said something about a game being so beautifully 3D, it was like watching anime. Is it not common knowledge that animes are cel-shaded and not 3D?!
Some of the idiotic blunders are actually hilariously funny. (Like the time when I forgot the "L" in the word health, making a headline read: Official on leave due to HEATH reasons.) An artsy-fartsy columnist once wrote something about the weirdness of today's music groups, so ridiculous they are called Savage Garden, Backstreet Boys, and ALANIS MORISSETTE. An unknown writer even mentioned "Marvel's Batman."
Bottomline, feature writing for newspapers and magazines is not like writing in your journal. Well, since reviews are their opinions in the matter, it's never wrong I suppose, just plain stupid. And you can't blame people for being stupid.
posted by Ban at 1:03 PM
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